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One day I got an unusual email. The sender warned I would be featured on a pornography site…unless I took certain steps involving money. They actually had one of my passwordsI must admit, I almost fell for that one. Did they really have access to my data? I put a few of my accounts on double-confirmation.
Then I realized it didn’t matter if they told the world I was featured on a porn site. Half the people who know me wouldn’t care and the other half would enjoy the show.
For the record, I’ve never been on a porn site. My book has some rather explicit language. That’s as close as I get.
People over 65 do get scammed a lot.
There are two reasons for this. First scammers associate getting older with having more assets. And scammers prey on stereotypes: they believe older people have cognitive deficits and they also believe the news about older people being lonely.
Scammers associate older people with more assets.
When I first moved to Philadelphia I joined a professional networking group. Almost every meeting included some financial planners. And after almost every meeting, some of those planners would ask if we could meet for coffee to “talk about our businesses.”
I rarely join people for coffee unless they have a specific agenda for our businesses.
But I gave in a few times. Inevitably my new acquaintances pretended to be interested in my marketing services. But they eagerly asked about my retirement investments. Even if I wanted to find a new advisor, did they really think I would turn to someone who was new to the industry?
Ultimately when I did switch to a new financial advisor, I sought out a referral for someone with at least ten years experience.
I don’t think those guys were trying to scam me, but fending off eager sales people takes energy. It requires a level of alertness that’s not required of people who are perceived as younger.
I did get a couple of good stories. One young man invited me to coffee. He mentioned that he’d played football in college and also (he modestly looked down at his coffee) in the pros.
“Really?” I asked. “What team?”
“Um..the Eagles,” he said, trying to look modest. That’s only the hottest sports team in Philadelphia.
Naturally I looked him up online. After all, it’s not every day you get to have coffee with a pro football player.
Sure enough, he’d been with the Eagles… as a walk-on for one summer training program. Then he was cut.
I wonder if this young man would have presented himself as a former Eagle to a younger person, especially to a male. He probably assumed I didn’t use the Internet. It never occurred to him to be scrupulously honest if he wanted to get his hands on someone else’s money.
Scammers prey on stereotypes.
An anonymous columnist at an online blog wrote, “I was talking to an elder that lived down the street from me. She was having problems with her grandson. She finally called the police to report that he was taking things from her.
All the grandson had to say to the cop was, “My grandmother is old. She doesn’t know what she is saying .”
The author continues: “Over time, younger generations …subtlety cease to identify with elders as human beings.”
Over time, scammers stop treating elderly people as fellow human beings.
This phenomenon has been identified as deindividuation. Philip Zimbardo’s Stanford Prison Experiment randomly assigned students roles as prisoners or guards in a made-up prison. The study would never be allowed today. Contemporary researchers sneer that it’s not really an experiment.
Still, the study brought home an important truth. When people don’t see you as human, they feel free to treat you as an inanimate object. They abuse you physically, mentally, and financially. Just watch a few videos on YouTube.
Scammers give us yet another reason to be on high alert for jokes and memes that insult “older” people. Ridicule is often the first step to serious bullying and abuse.
Think about that when you’re talking about geezers and grandmas. It’s not about being over-sensitive. It’s encouraging people to look past the stereotypes and see a real person.
